Flesh and Blood Relationships are Hotter than Internet Personas

I recently read this article in "The New York Times" called The Medium - Love, Virtually by Virginia Heffernan. The author speaks about how internet- initiated romances pale next to flesh-and-blood ones. She says "I am starting to think that Internet romances, including Mark Sanford's are not romances between people at all. They're affairs with the Internet."

With so many communication devices our desires are for connection to technology rather than with people. How many of you have been "dumped" by a text message, and/or e-mail? The digital age has changed dating. Do you remember when there was just the phone? You were so excited if the one you were waiting for was on the line. Heffernan writes "phone romances were defined by ringing and sonorousness and breathing and silences and click, the dread hang-up, whereas e-relationships turn on fonts and typing tics, shots at poetry, visibility and invisibility in various social media".

Now we have relationships with our computers-waiting for the next text, the next e-mail. Do you ever actually talk face to face anymore? I think that is why I don't like internet dating. You are not getting to know the person but their profile. The profile is more like a job application and gives very little insight about the person. Plus how many people really tell the truth? Guys using pictures of what they looked like 10 years, lying about their age and who knows what else! Call me old fashion but I enjoy going to a coffee house and meeting face to face and discussing my dreams and aspirations with a potential mate. I love my IPHONE but when it comes to dating I take a human over a computer any day of the week! Maybe that is why people like Eight at Eight better then the internet dating. You actually get to meet real people!

Texting takes all the fun out of dating

A recent blog post by Niki Payne of the LA Examiner poses a fascinating question: what place (if any) does the text message have in the early phases of getting to know someone? Payne suggests that the when a woman gives a man her phone number, she expects a call and not a text. She further claims that the text indicates a desire for a "casual encounter" more than an actual relationship.

To be honest, I'd never thought about this one. In my personal life, I use the text message as a quick way to not interrupt someone else's life. If I call you, you may have to stop what you're doing to answer. The text allows you to get back to me when its convenient. However, I'm begining to see where Ms. Payne is coming from. I've railed about the alienation that technology has created in our lives before, so perhaps this is another example of the de-humanizing effects of our Crackberries and email accounts.

Moral of the story: take the time for a phone call. Moreover, take the time for a hand-written note instead of an email. Drop by to see someone and bypass the phone call. Heck, volunteer for a charity one afternoon instead of just writing a check. I'd suggest we might benefit from a bit more human interaction and a little less ones and zeros.