Every holiday or major event comes with its share of annoyances. New Year's Eve is no different. Why is it that we all seem to suffer from collective amnesia when it comes to NYE? Thinking back, most of my nights out on December 31st were nightmares, and I'm sure I'm not the only one. Why do we always claim to have a wonderful time on NYE when, in fact, its generally a major pain? Is it the booze? The overwhelming hopefulness of the coming year? Am I just a grump? You tell me: here are some of my most aggravating experiences during New Year's Eve nights out.
1) The bathroom line.
You know this has happened to you: It's 40 minutes until the New Year, so you rush to the bathroom to beat the lines and be back in time for Dick Clark to count down that giant ball. Like you, everyone in the building is operating according to the same strategy. Just as you approach the stall, the chant begins... 10, 9, 8... Another new year celebrated amid a stack of seat covers!
2) Party favors.
Confetti. Annoying horns. Silly Hats. Beads. 'Nuff said.
3) Too Many People.
You drop $150 for the most happening party in town. You get to the door and its stacked 50 deep at the bar. The door guy approaches you and offers V.I.P. treatment for an additional $50, which takes you upstairs to a bar that is merely 40 people deep! And don't be fooled by the 2 AM breakfast buffet--it's bad...
4) Vomit.
Someone, without fail, will throw up in proximity to you. It's a fact of life.
5) Taxis.
4-leaf clovers are easier to come by than a cab on New Year's Eve. By 3 AM, you'd give the deed to house for a guy pulling a rickshaw and a bottled water.
6) Where'd my friend go?
You're at a party in the ballroom of a hotel and there are 6000 people amid disco lights and smoke. You're going to get separated from your group. You will not find them. Why? Because they are in the bathroom line (see #1).
I must admit, though, that the best NYE celebrations have always been at a friend's house, away from the sound and the fury, the hustle and the bustle. Do yourself a favor: avoid the throng of people. Invite your nearest and dearest over. Buy a few bottles of bubbly (grape juice or champagne, whichever floats your boat), and then make a resolution to do it more often. You'll thank us. Here's wishing you a happy, healthy 2009!
